Diapers (by Cody)

I bought diapers for the first time this week and it was a life-changing experience.  You may think that I have started early buying these little treasures but I hope to have a decent stockpile of diapers on top of what others will be giving to us through baby showers and such.  Planning ahead can't hurt, right?  It's never too late to start planning ahead.  

The mere act of buying diapers was not life-changing in itself.  Rather, my life changed while standing in the aisle staring at all the diaper variety in all its absorbent glory.  This was an aisle that I breezed by every other trip to the grocery store while secretly thinking to myself, "Aren't I glad I don't have to deal with that?"  Year after year passed as I left that aisle in my proverbial rearview mirror...until now.  No, this time I slowly walked down the aisle observing an entire industry trying to get my attention and make me buy bottles and wipes and jars of food and pacifiers and many other things that I only vaguely know to exist.  I was a foreigner in a foreign land but I kept going. I was surprised to find that diapers come in many makes and models.  I also learned that you buy diapers for babies like you buy dog food for dogs--by weight.  Then on top of each weight class were sizes like large, jumbo, etc.  

Anyway, it really hit me that I couldn't just walk by this aisle and pretend that Andrea just had the stomach flu or mono or something instead of actively brewing a baby.  The aisle in my rearview now filled the entire horizon in front of me.  So I stood there.  I stood there taking deep breaths and eventually reached out for a pack of the Value diapers (at the suggestion of some of our friends) for a baby ranging from 8-14 pounds.  I turned around and pushed the cart--feeling a lot heavier for some reason--towards the check out.  The next thing I knew was that I was walking by Andrea at home tossing the pack of diapers into our storage closet after showing it to her without a word.  It was a silent, awe-filled moment.

This may sound negative and I really hope that it doesn't come across like that.  While it's true that we weren't planning on this new adventure and that it really changes our future, I do not feel that life is over.  Ok, to be honest, I thought it was a few times...but that's behind me.  Truly, this change has been tough for me to accept because I still feel like an 18 year old in my mind and this is way too "adult-ish" for me.  But that has begun change and it started with a bag of diapers.  I can't deny reality any longer.  I plan to embrace it and I even plan on living out our dreams.  I am convinced it can be done. We will not only survive, we will thrive.

**orginally published at Cody's personal blog: The Coffeehouse Pilgrim

Babysitting and photo fun

For those who know Cody and me, it is safe to say that when it comes to babies, we have absolutely no clue what we are doing. Although I have a brother and a sister and a nephew who is more like a brother than a nephew, I grew up an only child, and Cody grew up the oldest of three. I remember when I was eight years old I begged my mom for a little brother or sister because my friend who lived down the street just got a new baby sister, and she was so cute, I wanted one too. Needless to say I never got my wish, but I wouldn't change a thing. I liked my life growing up as an only child- it's not as lonely as people who grew up with siblings will try to make you believe, I promise. And while we all have our issues, I would like to think I'm not a total screw-up as a result.

Yesterday, Cody and I spent the afternoon with our friend's little 7-month-old, Cruz, while his parents Jason and Jessica Williams were out doing a photo shoot for their new business, Session 9 Photography. Jay and Jess are two of the best people we have ever had the privilege of calling friend, and their little boy is so adorable you could just eat him up. So it was a no-brainer to embark on our first babysitting adventure as a couple with Cruz at the helm.

What a day! We had fun rolling around on the floor with him, keeping him entertained with his toys and various ridiculous faces, watching Finding Nemo, taking him for a ride in his stroller through their neighborhood, marveling at the sheer volume of spit-up that a single child can produce, and learning that baby wipes aren't meant to be thrown by themselves into a Diaper Genie (definitely something I will NEVER FORGET AGAIN). Cruz is such a happy baby that even when he's fussy he's still a joy to be around. And I am so happy that we have this particular family alongside us through this totally unpredictable journey we find ourselves on, because their own experiences and uncertainties parallel ours in so many ways, and things have turned out more than fine for them. It's such an encouragement to both of us.

On another note, Cody and I are going to start taking belly pictures in the very near future. I'm not showing yet, but it will be fun to document the progress over the next several months. If I were funnier and more creative and also 25 weeks further into my pregnancy, I would have thought of this first, but I digress.

We have our first photo shoot with Session 9 next weekend and we are SO EXCITED. I say first shoot because they will be doing our maternity and hospital shots as well! The only experience I have had as a "model" was at our wedding- and funny story, I was so barfy at our wedding that I spent half the time that would have been spent taking pictures in the bathroom, and now I'm in my first trimester and am feeling barfy all the time... so I'm 0 for 2 at the moment. Good news is that I haven't actually "finished the job," if you know what I mean; I just constantly feel on the brink of it. It will be fun to get all decked out for this shoot since these days my favorite thing to do is not wear makeup so I don't have to make the effort to take it off at night, because that is A LOT OF EFFORT. I am anxiously awaiting my blood test results from the doctor so they can tell me that yes, I am indeed anemic, and then they will give me a magical pill that will take the edge off the simply unreal fatigue that is brought on by this building-a-human-being business, and I can finally wake up from this haze I have been living in for the past month and start to feel normal again.

And yes, I am fully aware that "normal" as I once knew it has ceased to exist. This "new normal" will be quite a ride.

(Originally published at Baby Steps to Mom on June 7, 2009.)